The Picayune Dispatch Headline Animator

Tuesday, December 16, 2008

Police Accused of Breaking Pervs Wanking Arm

A jury heard opening statements in a lawsuit by a man who says San Francisco police broke his wanking arm while he was trying to enjoy a pornographic movie in the comfort of his own home.

The unusual case began when Richard Johnson was chugging 40-ounce beers while watching "Skanky Ho #87" with the volume turned up to eleven, according to witness testimony.

Police were initially called by Johnson's wife, Mildred, who asked "can you send someone to stop my husband? I just can't stand it anymore," according to 911 tapes.

San Francisco police mounted a massive response with some 69 officers responding to the 911 call.

The first officers to arrive at the Johnson home encountered Mr. Johnson lying naked on his couch watching the movie. As more officers arrived and blocked Mr. Johnson's view of the television, he became irate, screaming "It's my movie! Mine! Go get you're own f---ing porn!" according to arresting officer Rod Peters.

Officer Peters said, "Suddenly there was this naked man screaming and flailing about. I though he might attack me, try to hurt me. So I yelled 'Take him down now!' Somewhere along the way, his arm was, unfortunately, broken." 

Mr. Johnson said he felt his world was coming apart when the officers moved to arrest him. "I felt that all of a sudden the world turned around, there was a revolution," Johnson said. "There was a police state where you couldn't even watch your own porn."

"He was upset," said Johnson's attorney, Harry Wang, outside the court. "But however he acted, that doesn't give them the right to break his arm. He's not an ambi-wanker; he may never be able to pleasure himself again."

Johnson is suing the San Francisco police for $50,000 for excessive force and $250,000 for loss of the use of his wanking arm.
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